Thursday, September 24, 2009

Tomorrow

Tomorrow, Friday, has the potential to be good or one of the worst days imaginable. After I talked with Dr. O, he spoke with Dr. M (the NVCI doc) and they decided that Adrienne should have a CT. It makes sense. We want to make sure the chemo is in fact working before doing more. But, it also means that we could find out that the chemo isn't working. The pulmonologist keeps telling us that her chest xrays look better and we've taken that to mean that chemo is working, but it's possible that everything else is better but the tumors aren't. Her breathing hasn't really improved. Will more chemo make a difference? I can't come up with words to explain how awful this is. They're going to send results to Dr. O as soon as they're available and we'll talk to Dr. M in the afternoon. If ever prayers were needed, this is the time. I'm so scared.

33 comments:

laulausmamma said...

Alison...you know we will all be storming the heavens tomorrow as Adrienne has her CT scan and you await the results. Things are looking good...hoping and praying that the CT scan will show good results so things can move forward as hoped/planned for.

((HUGS)) of encouragement, support, courage and love...
Susan and Rich
xoxox

Bonnie said...

Here's to an improved CT! Time for that Xanax I would imagine. Hope you get some rest and then get some great news tomorrow.

Giant hugs

Bonnie

Kirsten (not Kristen) said...

Absolutely, Alison. In droves...

Hugs,
Kirsten

Anonymous said...

Oh Alison, hang in there. Please try not to assume the worst (easier said than done, i know). Try to talk to yourself as if you were your own best friend. It is self-torture to relentlessly predict what tomorrow will bring. You will have to deal with it either way tomorrow and there is still hope. Breathe and take something, please. We are all behind you and Adrienne. We are anguished with you. Adrienne is loved by so many and so are you. Prayers for health, strength and some light. You are so very deserving of a reprieve from this nightmare.

`ryan patrick sutton said...

adrienne & alison! you know you can count on me for some solid prayers from both the catholic & jewish sides of my heritage! (it looks like i have some legitimate jewish in my as i recently found out!!!!) am glad you have dr. o looking out for both you and adrienne constantly. i'm so lucky i met both of you and here's hoping for a night of peace and healing before the CT. amazing how many doctors and nurses (and mothers!) and commenters are trying to help you adrienne kick the cannoli out of this disease. more soon as always and best wishes. love, `ryan patrick sutton

Chris said...

Visualizing a good CT result...

It's not her time yet, her spirit is too strong.

Will be thinking of you both till the news comes back.

Chris

Veronica said...

Prayers, prayers, prayers, prayers and a whole bunch of love.......<3

Anonymous said...

Alison snd Adrienne,

I will pray for good news tomorrow.

Love,
Wendy

Anonymous said...

Alison,

Praying with love, hope, and faith. God bless your heart.

Lisa

Julie said...

Much love, many hugs, and an abundance of prayers...

Julie (aka beightler68)

Unknown said...

Lifting you and your family up . . . take heart from the strength around you, and in you.

Karen, Clare's mom

cathyn said...

I am praying for you all :)

Cathy

momofmike said...

Praying for good results and peace for you and Adrienne.

Sharon

Anonymous said...

Alison - I wish I could HUG you in person today. Thinking of you all and praying like crazy. Olivia (my 2 yr old) say our prayers every night and we include your family everynight too.
Stay strong. Love and hugs,
Stacy xo

Hannah said...

Alison,
Praying with all my heart.....God Bless Adrienne and all of you.
Hannah

Ann Breidenstein said...

Alison,

Prayers on the way for great news on Adrienne's cat scan!

God bless you, lots of love and hugs,

Ann

Anonymous said...

Alison,
Praying with all my heart - God Bless Adrienne and all of you.
Hannah

Anonymous said...

Alison
Prayers sent...will be thinking of you both today and hoping for the CT results to be brilliant.
((HUGS))
Carol

Skye said...

Lots of prayers, thoughts, and positive vibes comin' at ya from Nebraska. I, too, don't believe this is Adrienne's time yet. She is such a fighter and you have been such a strong advocate for her that I refuse to believe anything except that the scans will show improvement and you will be able to move forward with the plan to get more chemo. Love and hugs to both of you.

Anonymous said...

I would be scared too.

I am holding you and Adrienne in my prayers today. I pray that your fears are eased. I pray that Adrienne's scan will show improvement.

Thank you for showing us the perfect love between a mother and child.

A Mom

Anonymous said...

I said a special prayer for Adrienne this morning and continue to pray for good news tomorrow. Great news about the blood counts rising--just goes to show that Adrienne is a fighter and not someone to be messed with! Sending you hugs and lots of support, Janet

erin and zach said...

Sending so many prayers, hugs and positive thoughts from Arkansas and hoping so badly that the CT shows some improvement. We have been thinking of you non-stop... Love you girls...xoxo Z&E

laulausmamma said...

Started off today asking that the news will be good...will have you on my mind throughout the day as will all your other friends. Feel the vibes of love and support surrounding you both as you wait for the news that will define the next steps.

With lots of love and ((HUGS)),
Susan

katmm said...

Hope Hugs and Prayers,
K

Anonymous said...

Hold tight Alison. Take big deep breaths, think positive. You can do it. Everything crossed ... fingers, toes. Lots of love P

KEK said...

I will be thinking of you all day. It would be great if the scan could show improvement and you could get to SGN. Obviously it's not a miracle cure, but I do think its a great chance. I know many people have moderate to severe side effects, but from what I understand, even more than that don't, and have a good response. I think it can give a lot of people an extended good quality period of life.

I think you are going to be ok if you just stick close to your supportive and encouraging doctors and tune out the negative doctors (and staff) who may be well-meaning but are failing because they are making current decision based on their predictions of the future. Yes, from their perspective it looks bleak or even like a foregone conclusion, but even in their negativity you would think they could recognize that things can change in an instant. And failing that, you would think that they could at minimum at least see it as a learning opportunity for everyone with respect to advanced Hodgkins treatment.

Whenever I look for the link to your blog, I go to Web Magic and look for the thread "Adrienne in hospital". Only every time I look for it, I'm thinking "Alison in hospital". And it's true.
Love (which I don't hand out lightly)
Kimberly

Anonymous said...

(((((((Adrienne&Alison))))))))
Cant wait to hear that Adriennes scan is improved!

(((Hugs)))
Gitte

Janna said...

Janna and I are thinking of you both, and sending all the bright and positive light and thoughts possible.
Hugs,
Carol and Janna

Sandy Corso said...

Alison,
Nothing but positive thoughts, lots of love and an abundance of prayers for Adrienne and, for you.
Big hugs... always,
Sandy

Kara said...

Lots of prayers today.. visualizing better better scans!!!!

Anonymous said...

Sending many many prayers and lots and lots of positive thoughts from Boston, MA!!!! Alison and Adrienne may tomorrow bring you both good news. STAY STONG!! Donna

laulausmamma said...

So many are sitting and waiting with you in thought and prayer.
((HUGS))
Susan

Anonymous said...

Prayers, faith, love and hope...
A great big Hawaiian hug is being sent your way,
Debra C